"Loneliness is one of the most universal human experiences, but our contemporary Western society has heightened the awareness of our loneliness to an unusual degree...  Instead of running away from our loneliness and trying to forget or deny it, we have to protect it and turn it into a fruitful solitude."
- Henri Nouwen

    Over the last few weeks I've told a lot of friends and family about my trip, and it's been interesting to see what people think.  Everyone loves the idea of traveling the world, but what they really love is telling me where I should go and what I should do.  It's good natured and sometimes really helpful, but funny how we want to enjoy vicariously something we've never done, or share a favorite place or memory.  I'm no different - just this week, I learned that a friend was going to Ireland, so without any invitation told her all about where I've been and where I wish I had gotten to go.

    Eventually, the question comes up, "so who are you going with?"  The answer elicits much different and differed responses.  Some people applaud me for it, many think it would be hard, and a few feel it necessary to tell me how terrible of an idea that is.  By the way, kind of rude to say to someone who's already bought plane tickets and everything.  But if someone were to compare the two sets of reactions, they would conclude that we want to travel, but are afraid to be alone; we want to go out of the country, but not out of our comfort zone.  That's deep, huh?

    Henri Nouwen, in his book Reaching Out, makes some great observations about loneliness.  Nouwen goes into detail about how our aloneness isn't something to avoid, but something to be cultivated; that we must, "convert [our] restless loneliness into a solitude of heart."  He points out how relationships driven by loneliness turn into a tiring and anxious clinging to each other, but that true community can be found when we see friendship as a gift rather than a need.  I couldn't agree more; I've seen it in friends and in myself.


Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in truth;
give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.
Psalm 86:11


    I'm excited to be alone for so long - it's an adventure in itself.  I mean, I've never done it, just like I've never traveled for so long.  It's a chance to spend undivided time with God, to listen and grow, to "ponder and search out." (Ecc. 12:9)  Jesus went into the desert for forty days, was attended by angels, then came back and proceeded to kick ass for three years straight.  Moses killed a dude, bounced, came back, raged against the machine, and drank water from a rock.  Jonah hung out in a fish.  Solitude is biblical, just trust me; it's going to be fine.  But really, if done right, a few months to myself will be a gift from God, one that I'll never forget.  I want to come back refreshed, centered, and at peace with God and with who He's made me.

    So now I leave in three days and can't wait.  After all that talk about being alone, it actually turns out that Dustin Cherry, a former Austin West YL great, will be joining me for a bit in New Zealand.  It'll be good to have someone else with me to learn the ropes of backpacking.

    Pretty soon I'll be posting pictures and stories instead of philosophizing.  I'll probably complain about how bored and lonely I am too...